I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
