life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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