let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
