But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
