butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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