Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
