He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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