Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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