how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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