I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
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