There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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