so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
