he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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