Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
