someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
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