He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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