Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
this will be a night to untag.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
