They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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