I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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