Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
