...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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