Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
