dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Is her dick bigger than yours?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
