I only kidnapped one of them. chill
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
