I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Randomize
