she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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