Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
