i don't plan on having that self control this summer
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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