"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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