Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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