Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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