You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
