If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize