Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
