The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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