At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
