life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
