Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
