I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize