Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Green mimosas i think yes
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
