Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I didn't notice because vodka
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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