I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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