I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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