She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
