Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
