whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
barbara walters just said penis...
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
