On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I love you. Go after that dick
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
