What did we do last night that was yellow?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
