Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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