They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
