Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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